Trump is much more than a GOAT. In fact, he is a GLOAT – Greatest Liar Of All Time – and some of his greatest are the lies that he tells about himself. As a bored again Christian he often portrays himself as, if not the saviour of mankind, at least the saviour of America with his miracles and his love of his people. (Remember too that he had to wander around in the wilderness for 4 years and be charged with a back-breaking 34 counts before he was resurrected.) As a fisher of men though, his arm span is not large enough to describe his self-declared achievements.
He has constantly sought immortality through his executive orders, riding roughshod over convention and law. He has appended his signature tag, that is in desperate need of defibrillation, to so many fatuous orders and boldly signed them with his Sharpies that by now they must be Blunties.
He is so desperate to be the greatest President ever that he has started economic and physical wars with enemies and allies alike but which he is incapable of ending. Starting so many wars also gives him the dubious claim to the Nobel Peace Prize for ending all of them (eventually).
Having failed to gain that recognition, he is using his prestigious talents in the art of interior design (according to himself) to convert Federal buildings into something akin to the interior of a Dubai nightclub. Suffering from ADHD – Attention Deficit Hyper Decoration disorder – he soon ran out of marbled bathrooms and wall space for his gold tat in the Whitehouse.
So, to set his greatness in stone, he has or intends to undertake monumental works. After all, they will remain long after he has shuffled off, whereas no amount of executive orders can protect his tacky décor choices. Without a plan, and after a night of Stormy tossed dreams, he woke up with an idea for an erection – he was going to build an enduring legacy, a grand ballroom. He promptly smashed the old one down before anyone could object. With the courts threatening to stymie him, he pivoted disgracefully and declared it to be an emergency and that he was building a huge secure Fuhrer bunker below his gold and marble grandiose erection. In addition, he has teased plans for a huge Arc de Trump and immortalising himself as the 5th president on Mt Rushmore.
To further promote his legacy, he has moved on from trashing his predecessors, particularly Obama and Biden. Like a delinquent graffiti artist, he now actively tries to get his tag slapped onto everything from airports through to the Kennedy Centre and everything in between. It looks like he’s moved on from the blame game to the name game.

His latest brain fart occurred on 27 August when he posted on Untruth Sociopath his ranking of the greatest presidents, naturally with himself at the top and Obama and Biden stone last. But in line with modern thinking on how to bring up kids and avoid hurting their delicate little egos, he should just get a participation certificate at best.








