The Casual Observer

A Quick SMAC #1: Inspector Clouseau

By Blaine McCleland in Opinion Pieces 3 May 2023 0 Comment

When Russia invaded Ukraine with massed forces, the Department of International Relations and Co-operation (DIRCO) rightly condemned it. Within 24 hours they obsequiously changed their position to plead for negotiation even though Russia was in complete contravention of the UN Charter regarding the vivisection of sovereign member countries. Their attempts at justification ran the gamut from the moral equivalence of the US con job – the Iraq War – to ‘we have shown the world the way of negotiation to solve problems’. It maintained that it was non-aligned but was actually aligning itself to China and Russia to help create a bipolar world. Along the way it allowed a Russian ship to dock in Simonstown with its transponder turned off and surreptitiously load unknown cargo in the dead of night. It followed this up by taking part in naval wargames with their newfound buddies, Russia and China. A bit of navel gazing would have been more appropriate. SA has also been all at sea with how to deal with Putin if he arrives for the planned BRICS conference later this year. All the while, SA repeatedly abstained from numerous votes in the UN condemning Russian aggression.

Suddenly, on 2 May, SA abstained as per normal in the UN – ho, hum – but their ‘non-aligned’ buddies; China, India and Brazil, threw them to the wolves by voting to condemn Russian aggression.

Oops. SA has found itself naked and clueless.

Quo vadis SA?

Schoenmakerskop of Yore: Is it Misplaced Nostalgia?

By Dean McCleland in Port Elizabeth of Yore 25 April 2023 0 Comment

As my father was raised in Schoenmakerskop, the family was compelled to swim there every weekend. Not for us the pleasures of swimming at Pollock Beach, Willows or, heaven forbid, Humewood. It was Schoenies yet again. As he knew the area intimately and it resonated with him, especially the old days, he would not waver in our destination except on the rare occasion. Deviating was a forlorn hope. Not once did we swim at Humewood. It never cracked a nod.

A taciturn man, he seldom spoke but on the odd occasion he would make a remark about what Schoenmakerskop used to be like. To him it was nirvana. But what did paradise offer the family when in 1913, and my dad was 2 years old, offer them that was so much peace and serenity?

Being compelled to discover the history of Schoenmakerskop for a blog some time ago, this question raised a bemused head. How would I classify existence in the early two decades of the village’s existence?

Main picture: Schoenmakerskop in 1907

Port Elizabeth of Yore: The P.E. Bowling Club

By Dean McCleland in Port Elizabeth of Yore 24 April 2023 0 Comment

The Port Elizabeth Bowling Club, the oldest Bowling Club in South Africa, was founded on the 14^th August 1882 and is located on the St George’s Park grounds. The blog is based almost solely on the St George’s Park website and the book The Social Chronical of Port Elizabeth to the end of 1949 by Margaret Harradine.

Main picture: St George’s Park in 1900. The Club House of the PE Bowling Club

Port Elizabeth of Yore: Origin of the name of Heugh Road

By Dean McCleland in Port Elizabeth of Yore 21 April 2023 0 Comment

On Sunday afternoons in the McCleland’s household we performed our familial duty by visiting the family’s matriarch, Elizabeth Daisy McCleland. She lived with her daughter, Thelma, at 99 Albert Street . One of the roads down which we drove bore a unique but odd name: Heugh. What puzzled me over the years was the origin of the word Heugh. Even though it sounded to be Germanic in origin, it clearly was not Afrikaans.

And so the mystery would remain unsolved for another 60 odd years, until, in the midst of my research into Port Elizabeth’s history, I have tracked it down. It is the derived from a successful merchant of Danish origins, Johannes Pieter Heugh.

Main picture: Castle Hill showing Prospect House formerly Stanley House

A SMAC in the Face #52: Catch Me If You Can

By Blaine McCleland in Jokes 21 April 2023 0 Comment

Thabo Bester put the con into convict. The convicted rapist and murderer, led a fantastic (using the original meaning related to fantasy) life until now. While serving his life sentence at the Mangaung Correctional Centre, he managed to first ensnare the beautiful Dr Nandipha Magudumana and inveigle her into his conman lifestyle. He then proceeded to create a fake persona, one Tom Mosepe, a fake business empire, 21st Century Media, and successfully run a massive scam from a zoom studio within the prison! This starts to put the original ‘Catch Me If You Can’ protagonist in the shade. He then went one step further. He escaped without anyone knowing about it.

By bribing several prison officials and getting his beloved Nandi to do the grunt work, he managed to get a dead body burnt in his cell in the dead of night and slipped out unnoticed into something more comfortable on 3 May 2022. I can just imagine the advert that Nandi would have placed in the Jobs section of Gumtree.

WANTED: Body double wanted for a remake of The Crypt which is about the undead. A once in a lifetime opportunity to make easy money. No experience required.

CONTACT: dr_strangelove@nandi.con

That was part un of the greatest South African pantomime ever. Part duh is what the official organisations did about it.

The next 9½ months witnessed a bizarre dance between the DCS (Department of Correctional Services), G4S (the private security company who ran the prison, oops, correctional centre), the SAPS (South African Police), JICS (Judicial Inspectorate of Correctional Services) and the DoJ (Department of Justice). All that was missing in the mendacious menagerie was the DOOS (Department of Officious and Odious Supernumeraries).

On 11 August, SAPS provided JICS with a copy of the autopsy stating that the body did not die in the fire and that it’s DNA did not match Bester’s. Did SAPS open a case? No!

The buck passing by the five groups involved, and the failure by any party to admit that Bester was actually dining out with Nandi’s at home enjoying her hot sauce, is too Byzantine to relate. Suffice to say, it took the investigative team of GroundUp to elicit routine denials when they published their first article on 8 November. The official response was a profound insouciance (the antidote to Nandi’s hot sauce), if not outright denial. This laissez affaire attitude continued with GroundUp grinding them down until 15 March 2023 when the DCS finally admitted that Bester was in the wind.

The silly saga was not yet played out. After Thabo and Nandi were captured in Tanzania, another three-letter acronym had the final say. During the subsequent parliamentary inquiry, the DHA (Department of Home Affairs) revealed that far from being undead, Thabo was, in fact, unborn as they have no records of him!

Port Elizabeth of Yore: Charles Lovemore’s Last Year, 1885

By Dean McCleland in Port Elizabeth of Yore 20 April 2023 0 Comment

This blog is an extract from the excellent book simply entitled The Lovemore Story by Bernard Johnston. Unlike his father, Henry Lovemore, who married four times over his life, Charles only married once, being the norm for the era. Charles’ occupation was that of a farmer and had inherited Bushy Park from his father Henry. In addition, he had acquired a great deal of other farmland and town property in his lifetime. Besides being a Justice of the Peace, he was an active member of the Divisional Council and the Licensing Court.

Harradine describes him as a “kind friend and genial companion” and “his voice and burly form will be missed from the morning market.”

This blog is enlightening as it covers the contemporary social and economic issues. Ironically many of the issues correlate with those under discussion today such as the closing time of drinking establishments.

Main picture: Charles Lovemore

Port Elizabeth of Yore: Shipping Activity of 13^th April 1935

By Dean McCleland in Port Elizabeth of Yore 13 April 2023 0 Comment

During the first half of the 20^th century, one major service, now in severe decline, occupied a prominent place in the city’s commercial life. That was shipping and its ancillary services. It was fortunate to represent both major industries in Port Elizabeth: the export of wool and the importation of motor vehicles’ parts to be assembled in the two major motor plants viz General Motors and Ford.

To satisfy the interests of commerce and the general public in these activities, The Eastern Province Herald ran various articles regularly on these activities. Interestingly these articles even listed the names of passengers.

My uncle, George Wood, the representative for Mitchell Cotts in Port Elizabeth, kept copies of these newspaper clippings especially where they mentioned him. This is an example of such an article published on the 13^th April 1935 and provides an insight into a vital aspect of commercial activity.

Main photo: Port entry of PE photographed on the 5 Jan1938 from the bridge of the German battleship training ship – SCHLESWIG HOLSTEIN during its 6 months cruise around Africa.

A SMAC in the Face: The Resurrection – a Cautionary Tale

By Blaine McCleland in Jokes 7 April 2023 0 Comment

And so it came to pass on 3 November 2020 that the Orange Jesus was hung out to dry. First Georgia, then Arizona denied him his divine right to rule until Jesus comes. All the while King Biden and Pontius Harris lorded it over him. He was cross and he couldn’t bear it. He had been beaten by a barely sentient Zimmer frame. He did however have his faithful dogs, the only ones allowed into his House, Rudi Giuliani and Sidney Powell, to fight for him amidst his deniers and enemies.

Port Elizabeth of Yore: St Croix as an Isolation “Hospital”

By Dean McCleland in Port Elizabeth of Yore 26 March 2023 0 Comment

In his book, East to the Isles, Colin Urquhart, details the history of the islands in Algoa Bay. Amongst the numerous stories of death, destruction, progress, and growth, Urquhart narrates the saga of the Canadian brig, RLT of 444 tons en route from Mauritius to Europe. This event commenced on the 23^rd of December 1891 when the RLT’s master, Captain W Thompson, informed the Harbour Master, Captain Young that he suspected that 10 passengers and crew were infected with smallpox.

To say that the town erupted in consternation would be an understatement.

Main picture: St. Croix Island seen from the nearest landfall at Hougham Park, just east of the Coega harbour development.

Port Elizabeth of Yore: The Wreck of the Lyngenfjord

By Dean McCleland in Port Elizabeth of Yore 24 March 2023 0 Comment

The Gale of 1902 in which a dozen ships were driven onto North End beach and wrecked, would be the last such mass destruction of vessels in a gale. The conversion from sailing vessels to steam powered ships was driven by productivity considerations but as an ancillary benefit, they would eradicate weather-related disasters. The Lyngenfjord was one of the sparse diet of wrecks over the next century.

Main picture: The Lyngenfjord taken by George Wood. Tins of petrol had just offloaded onto the cliff edge when the disaster occurred.